Barbarian shows how domestic abuse often happens
Content Warnings:
Spoilers for Barbarian 2022, Sexual Assault, Domestic violence, Horror movie description
I love horror movies, I think they can be a great escape/tension release (after a good jump scare my body settles), sometimes a excellent break for the mind and every so often they work as a great art for discussing culture. I believe Barbarian shows the why of a survivor’s experience painfully well.
Not Who you think:
We start on a rainy night, a woman alone with her ex (I’m assuming) calling over and over. Most folks socialized as girls have been warned against this so many times, don’t be alone at night, trust no one, so I’m already tense as so many stories are based on this exact warning. The scene calls for the viewer to wish for her to just get home safe… then Keith played by the ever creepy Bill Skarsgård has already booked the rental place. Again the viewer knows not to trust someone who can smile like he does playing Pennywise in It. Yet, we eventually find out he is not the monster just and awkward dude who expresses the same thing many women hear when fleeing abuse; just meet another man, just get move on.. just, just… just.
She Can Save Him:
Again, we can called upon to remember the messages of other stories where women can save the scary man. That if she trudges through the signs of danger and is just tough, she can save the day and show us the prince that lies underneath. Keith doesn’t believe Tess that something is wrong, he has to get involved and violence follows. This makes me think of how many secondary victims (someone connected and impacted by violence because they care about the person who experienced it) threaten to get back at the person… leaving the person who first experienced violence to experience even more and less control.
Honeymoon/I want to take care of you:
I loved the confusion I had when after Skarsgård’s end when hard cut to a scenic beach with a Justin Long, who’ve seen over and over be the nicest… just like when in an abuse cycle the violence can stop suddenly and the honeymoon or sweetness is so present its almost hard to believe the horrible thing just happened. The movie almost says don’t think of that… we’re looking at the nice thing now, but the violence haunts and as Long gets to the home we have the same tension that builds in an abuse cycle.
This theme is also present in the way Tess copes with the monster.. saying she just wants to mother you… The “love” tasks are gross and dirty capturing how many survivors feel as their abuser is trying to repair and care for them… they accept for safety, they walk on eggshells and find all the ways to survive because to leave escalates violence.
Justification:
Long is revealed to have sexually assaulted a co-star. He goes back to Detroit where he assumes his bad behaviour will be accepted as he makes the harm explicit while talking to a friend and calls the never shown co-star… not showing her highlights his self absorption.. the apology isn’t for her but to try to repair his image and conscious. We see how AJ justifies every self serving action like throwing Tess off the water tower.
It is heavily implied that the monster went through horrific trauma by the hands of the old man, so we can understand of this being got to where they are at… yet it does not justify it. The choice is still made to replicate the cycle of confinement rather than seek changing the pattern or escape.
Lack of Support:
Lastly, so many stories and horror movies resolve as the hero finds help, and this is expected as Tess tries to get the police to help. So often survivors are blamed or not believed so of course the cops didn’t believe her. The person who could help, didn’t barge in or pretend to rescue he tried to get her to a staff place and the movie shows just how much that doesn’t always work too.
The Ending:
The “monster” gives Tess a kiss and calls her baby before allowing her to kill her… still trying to decide how the relationship is defined against the logic that Tess is not her baby, still the woman dying when the old man caused her trauma, still wrapped with violence even at the end and perhaps some hope that you can leave, you can end the unhealthy cycle but it does mean the relationship and any tenderness within in it dying. A sadness, tenderness and maybe love many people don’t give survivors space to feel or space for.
Image sources:
https://www.commonsensemedia.org/movie-reviews/barbarian
https://www.heavenofhorror.com/reviews/barbarian-2022-horror-hbo/