Treat Yourself Like a Dog

My partner and I adopted an anxious dog recently. He is very sweet and most of what is on my mind lately. More than anything I’m struck by how much easier it is to be compassionate to any thing he is going through than my own thoughts, experiences and behaviours. It’s so easy to see that he is trying his best, learning and sometimes resistant even though the training is for his own good.

Some recent lessons

Pushing through anxiety is not always helpful

When scared he needs comfort, positive affirmation and breaks. So, how could I expect to give myself a hard time and be calmer? Maybe, I need soothing and care when overwhelmed too…

Walks Help My Mental Health

The week we got Banjo, it was -30 and awful to go outside. Yet, I took more breaks, noticed more things he was smelling, met neighbours and found more mindfulness. The walks helped even at the worst temperatures.

I have to respond to being overstimulated

When B is overstimulated there’s no ignoring it. He seems to need my firm voice, a walk, running around with a toy or laying down together. When I get overstimulated I often try to just keep going, until I hit a wall or crash. Noticing my own nervous system to help calm the dog has made me respond to it that much more. At times I slow down, others I speed up to get out of a different kind of overwhelm. Dang it, I’m crashing less, noticing struggles sooner and able to adapt.

Any new habit takes time and getting through resistance

There is a fun mix of the dog really trying to learn and then rebelling… I do that for every new thing! Being with the resistance and noticing how hard change is sucks and works. Giving him/myself that understanding makes him/me do the new good thing more because the pressure’s off and there is less negative association.

Joy is right there

Adjusting to having a new dog is exhausting, hard and very fun. There more cuteness, more play, and more of who I am present. Lots of that joy was always there and bursting that much more now. I get to notice it more and want to keep noticing it as this becomes normal.