Coping with Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria
What is Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria?
As humans need each other to survive, feeling like we might be shunned can feel life threatening. Though anyone can be sensitive to rejection, after a lifetime of ADHD causing real rejection it can be an extra raw process. When someone even hints at rejection it can bring out intense feelings of sadness, fear and anger causing our survival responses to kick in, Fight, Flight, Freeze and Fawn (befriend and tend/people pleasing).
Externalizing
putting the part of you thinking the hurtful things over and over outside, maybe naming it so you can say “shut up Robert” Some folks imagine it as a monster or just their finger. Credit to Cateisaurus and her video Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria and ADHD.
Reality checking
If you are experiencing the fear with someone you trust, asking if your thoughts are matching reality. Ex: When you say I’m too busy, I’m assuming its cause you don’t like me, is that real?
Self-Compassion
What a hard experience! You deserve extra love not less! Maybe asking someone you trust for comfort (I know that’s really hard in the midst of a rejection swirl) or giving yourself some positive self-talk. Acknowledge the feeling, notice how normal and human it is and give yourself comfort like a hug, warm drink or encouraging words.
Shake It Off
We are at heart animals, who need a good shaking sometimes. It can be imagining the fear coming out of your body as you flick your limbs or full on dancing it out!
Sources:
Cateisaurus (2022) Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria and ADHD https://youtu.be/FNM_QMBqe2M